the band really sucks

           TUESDAY 7/31/18 10:20PM--As far as *I* am concerned the Combustibles are wasting their time
practicing...seemingly the other band members don't hear how bad we are, or they don't care...Apparently, Barry doesn't want me to play alongside him Thursday night, he didn't ask me...unfortunately, Jeff does...I think Jeff wants me to play exactly what's on the recording...I have GOT to learn how to politely say NO when certain people ask me to do what I don't wanna do...I invited Angela; only God knows why...IF she comes to the OTWC tomorrow, I intend to uninvite her...or at least find out how likely she'll actually be there...
     WEDNESDAY10:45AM--In part because I left my hat at practice, and in part because I want more than one, I went to Target and bought another fedora--a Blue one...I think it fits at least as well as the first one...after my (likely brief) mid-day nap I'm gonna TRY to find the CD that Jeff Jones probably made for me and work on learning his songs...
     4:35PM--I went thru (I believe) each and every container in the basement looking for the Jeff Jones CD...I didn't find it...I found lotsa pictures, the receipt for the car I bought from a "friend" back in 2006 (?) or 2003...lotsa cassette tapes and VHS tapes...and some bad song lyrics (mine)...I was hoping to find all my 45s, but I didn't...I can't believe I'd throw them away...
                           I'm secretly hoping Jeff will UNhire me, but I don't think he will...my plan for tomorrow is to check my Musical gear to see if I can determine where my electrical problem is...I THINK it might be a potentiometer, specifically the master volume knob on Butterscotch...I suspect I'll be using "eBay" as my FIRST choice for a little while...

Am *I* in charge?

             MONDAY 7/30/18 7:30AM--The SAW open mic is coming up on Thursday...Jeff Jones expressed an interest in my accompanying him that evening...haven't heard from him since he first mentioned it...Barry is also playing that night--he hasn't said a single word to me about it...Haven't heard from Cara either...I'm not chasing after anybody...I can excuse Cara, she's young, maybe a teeny bit scared of me...but Jeff Jones? no...Barry Fantle? nope...
           10:30AM--I think maybe I might be sufficiently recovered enough from the past few days of music making to possibly go out tonight--or more likely, if there's no band rehearsal, to IPO tomorrow evening...I'll wait until later today and check with Barry...I predict that if I can't/don't go to IPO, Angela will...
         Jeff just put the open mic event notice on his page, which means all his friends get it--that includes me...maybe he's prepping the song files even now...
 6:16PM--Angela MIGHT go to Crossroads open mic tonight...I'm definitely going, in case she does...the semi-bad news? I have band Practice on Tuesday, so I can't go to IPO if she does that...the good news? We have a gig Friday night...the semi-bad news? It's in New Market...
          Angela is (as of now) a definite--and now I'm scared sh*tless...seriously considering taking a Xanax...
  7:50PM-and so I did-I think it has started working...but I still need to keep myself calm...which mostly means not talking too much...
  9:46PM-she’s sitting at the same table as me...I’m trying to keep it together...
TUESDAY 1AM--I'm back home...Angela is quite the guitar player and a very good singer--but *I* hit most of the high notes...along with Alan, we did two or three Eagles songs...we played one of her songs...if nothing else, I think she knows I can play...Alan and I did Guinevere...
8:46AM--Jeff Jones is expecting me to play with him on Thursday...Barry still hasn't said a dammed thing...
9:52AM--If Angela doesn't suspect she has an admirer, I'd be surprised...I'm not assuming that she'll be at the OTWC on Thursday, but I'm kinda hoping she will be...I absolutely DON'T expect her to come out to see the Combustibles on Friday...New Market is not at all close...
5:26PM--leaving for practice in about an hour...still hoping it will get cancelled--really, will the band be that much better if we practice? nope, it won't be...and if I get all the way to Rick's house and THEN practice gets cancelled, I won't mind too much...I'll just go to IPO...
     Last night Alan, while we were discussing Barry, said basically "He enjoys what he's doing, he's not seriously hurting anybody, don't worry about it..."  Easy for him to say, he's not in a band with him...

all's well that ends well

       SATURDAY 7:50PM--just got in from the Ray Benefit gig...I wanted to get there before 1:30, but I missed it by about five minutes...I set up and went to keep Dianne company until our friends Sue and Mike arrived...I was kinda surprised when Ray called me up onstage right away...my guitar playing was (initially) atrocious, but once I warmed up, I did pretty good...maybe because I didn't THINK about my throat, I went for some high notes and hit 'em...Dianne said she could hear the high notes I was singing--that's good enough for me...*I* couldn't quite hear 'em, but it don't matter now...
              There were a couple of breaks; the band TIPSC played a set...a guy I hadn't seen since High School somehow--and I still don't know how--apparently knows Ray...he did a few songs...some other friends of Ray's did some numbers...a certain girl I spotted on FB who "fascinated" me did show up...She and I have a friend (besides Ray) in common...so I had her send a Facebook message to that friend...that was fun...Overall, I think we did a good job...I gave Dianne the $20 bucks Ray gave me...Frankly, from what I could hear of my harmonies, they were pretty damn good...
            Sue and Mike were there, for a couple of hours...The gig ended at about 5:30...I guess I kinda took my time packing up...I think we left Pirates' Cove at about 6:15, more or less...we stopped at High's where we both got something to munch on--I got a mini-sub...we also stopped at Rita's and both got a Chocolate ice thingie...
                      Sunday I don't have any plans whatsoever...except to work on the dishes...that shouldn't take all day...I may or may not have plans for Monday and/or Tuesday...and if I don't, that's OK too...
   10:22PM--I dunno where it came from but suddenly, I've got a second wind...that sucks...ready or not, I think I'm going to bed at 11PM...
        It's weird...for about seven hours, Cara, Angela, the OTWC, Barry, Michelle, etc.didn't exist...it was kinda refreshing...
SUNDAY 10:22AM--still recovering physically and emotionally from yesterday's gig with Ray et al...kinda have to keep reminding myself that I'm back in G-burg...I'm surprised there aren't more photos from the show--two so far I think and no videos yet...maybe I'm being impatient...
  5:36PM--finally got the mid-day nap...went to the grocery store...now I'm back home, and I don't feel like doing anything...as far as I can remember, I haven't made any plans for tomorrow...allegedly there's a Combustibles rehearsal on Tues--I kinda hope not; I figure If *I* go to IPO, Angela won't...and if I can't/don't, then she'll be there...I'm supposed to play alongside Jeff Jones, but he hasn't sent me any files yet...maybe (hopefully) he has changed his Mind...Barry is also playing that night, but he hasn't said ANYTHING to me about it...
7:45PM--reading some, Facebooking some, just going back and forth between the two, killing time...whether I want to or not, I'll probably make it to 11PM, more or less...

I was wrong, I guess

                             FRIDAY 7/27/18 2AM--Just got in from the OTWC open mic, which ended at about 12:30...Cara had next to no audience by the time she got "onstage"...We did three songs I think...there were some rough spots, but we all survived...the roughest one was her fault IMO...as for the twangy opening set, MY two songs came off rather well...
          I may be wrong about Cara "needing lotsa help", at least not as much as I initially thought...In fact I think she might have perfect pitch (if that's what it's called) and that's quite a gift to have if you're a singer...I'm sooo glad I have nothing to do later today--although I should buy some electric guitar strings...I'm only taking Butterscotch to Ray's gig on Saturday--maybe...if there's room for ebay I'll take it...
               8:22AM--still feeling a bit "oogy", but getting better ...I'm really surprised that I had any voice to sing with last night, but I did...I've got some household chores to do and I should get gas...and I should get electric gtr. strings...
          11:25AM-- trying to find a way to keep Dianne AND myself happy with regards to our travel plans on Saturday...ultimately, I believe only one of us will be happy...guess who it will be?
         12:19PM--I see where Stu Judd went to Hershey's last night; he brought a 12-string Les Paul (Epiphone?) with him...I guess we won't be working together anymore--that's sad...all because of political differences...
     5:30PM--I'm TRYING to unofficially, informally run into Angela somewhere, but my plans keep getting squashed...I was planning to go to IPO on Tuesday; Angela has been there at least once before...Barry wants to have a Combustibles rehearsal that day...of course a lot can happen between now and then...
 9:19PM--about 45 minutes from my first attempt tonight to get some sleep...
SATURDAY 8:30AM--actually got about eight hours sleep...leaving for Pirates' Cove in about three and a half hours...if I don't forget, I'll take a Xanax when we get there...harmony singing is important to me, but I don't think I've got my singing voice back yet...getting nervous about the Ray Benefit Gig...he needs me more as a guitarist than singer...

the moment of truth

             THURSDAY 7/26/18 7:22AM--sometime after breakfast I will start on the chord charts...I hope to be finished all three of them by ten o'clock...after Lunch I will TRY to catch a few winks...my breathing is not bad, but my voice? Don't ask...
           9:13AM--I think I've got ALL the chord charts to ALL the songs (mine and Cara's) done...took about an hour and a half...I FALL TO PIECES took about ten minutes...to play it in Bb I put my capo on the first fret...
      10:30AM--I dunno for sure, but I'm considering having Dinner at the OTWC...or going to Wendy's for chicken tenders...or...??? I'm watching a movie that ends at 12:30...I hope to be napping by then...and sleeping until at least 3:30 or so...
    11:33AM--went to CVS, got some throat lozenges...hoping it will help me tonight...I feel as though I can't have Lunch until the lozenges have dissolved...
     12:37PM--I've been going to open mics since about 1990...I don't think I've been more nervous...I'd be a little less nervous if Cara wasn't there, but only a little...
    3:20PM- and yet again, no midday nap… I guess I’m too nervous; my breathing is OK, my singing voice? Who knows? I'm ashamed to say it, but I hope Cara chickens out...ONE rehearsal would have made me happy...
     And I was gonna take the Tele, but I think I'm gonna spend time tuning it onstage, and I already have enough to worry about...
        For instance, I dunno exactly what I'm gonna wear tonight...or what I'm having for Dinner...I'm definitely gonna take a Xanax; I think two would be too much--maybe...
    10:50PM-  Angela is a no-show; but Cara made it…  she might be more together than I thought she was, and she’s pretty darn brave in my opinion…

soon would be nice

WEDNESDAY 7/25718 9:43PM--I think the cleaning ladies are coming this morning...Frankly, I was hoping they would be here by now...I think that two weeks ago, they came at about this time...

 I think I felt better this morning than yesterday; maybe I'll feel even better tomorrow...I'm still working on my Cara homework...I need to spend at least a little time on my Country homework...

     The cleaning ladies arrive at noon, so I went to subway for lunch… It’s been 30 minutes and I think they’ll be done shortly;

12:40PM- I am fairly sure Angela is coming to the open mic tomorrow night… I’ll get excited/nervous about that,  in addition to performing with Cara  and me singing two Hardcore country songs…

3:35PM--Butterscotch has new strings on it and I've started doing laundry...I didn't get the nap I wanted...I wonder if my afternoon naps have gone the way of the cassette? That's what I'm afraid of...

6:35PM--feeling better by the hour...I think I might finally done building lyric/chord sheets for the three songs *I* think Cara and I are doing tomorrow...I'm starting to get nervous about tomorrow's open mic at the OTWC...if accompanying Cara wasn't scary enough, I'm fairly sure Angela will be there...Friday should be a day of rest...Saturday is Ray's benefit--that's super scary to me...

I've been putting off practicing my guitar parts, so I GOTTA work on 'em tomorrow--during the day, more or less from morning until about 4PM or so...if I HAVE to shave again, I can...I expect to be doing laundry as well...

the fun continues

       
                MONDAY 7/23/18 12:30PM--I think I caught a cold yesterday at Lake Needwood...I've already had some Chicken Noodle soup and some Vitamin C gummies...and I've started on my Cara homework...I can't remember the last time a girl/woman haunted me like this...in a NON-sexual way...I actually think she needs help...maybe *I* can be that help, at least a little...

             In other Musical News, Stoney says  "Karen" wants to sing I Fall to Pieces on Thursday...he CAN'T mean Karen Hardman...but I bet he does...and all the "homework" I have (the twangin' stuff and Cara's four songs) is starting to stress me out...

         I've been so focused on Cara that I've kinda put Angela off to the side...Truth be told, I don't think Angela and I are as compatible as I would like us to be--I don't yet know that for a fact, it's just a feeling I have...but I still hope she'll be at the OTWC on Thursday...

            UPDATE--Stoney was NOT talking about Karen Hardman...I feel better already...

TUESDAY 1PM--Cara shot a video of what at the time was her new apartment...not that *I* have room to talk, but yeah, she's damaged goods...maybe she has a drug problem, I dunno...I found it very hard to watch the whole twenty minutes...

7:23PM--I know I say this almost every evening, but I really REALLY wanna be in bed tonight before 11PM...the litter box is done and the trash is ready to go to the curb...I just saw on FB where Angela is interested in going to the IPO open mic, which has possibly just started...F**K...I hope she goes to the OTWC open mic...and I hope I feel a LOT better by then, say Thursday 6PM...

7:57PM--the evidence is strong that Angela DID in fact go to IPO tonight...FUCK !!! On the other hand, based on where she apparently went the other night and who she saw, we might not be all that compatible...I'm pretty sure before tomorrow, there will be video on Facebook with Angela in it...In fact, I expect the video to be on there by the time I go to bed...

Angela sent me a message from Alan aggressively but jokingly suggesting I "get [my] butt over [there]...I've GOT to be over this cold by the time I leave for the OTWC...

10:06PM--I think I've got MY lyric sheets for the three songs *I* wanna do with Cara...they will be chord sheets when I'm finished...
               

here's my chance, but...

        SUNDAY 7/22/18 11:30AM--I tell myself that if Dianne isn't around, I'll go to the Gazebo Jam...well, she won't be around today...I'm not sure what the weather will be yet, and that IS important...right NOW, I'm thinking I probably won't go...but a lot can happen in two hours...my problem is that I don't like to miss anything...I go really early to get a good parking space, and I'm almost always nearly the last to leave...I think I'd be more likely to go if I had put new strings on the acoustic...

   2PM-no, I’m at Lake  Needwood-and it’s pouring rain...dunno who else is gonna be here and for how long...
  5:41PM--eventually Larry and Todd (ex-bandmates) arrived as did a couple of other musicians...I'm not sure, but I think I woulda prefered a bit larger crowd...my playing was IMO OK--I started making even more mistakes as I got tired...I was right about not getting much of a nap earlier this afternoon--I'm REALLY tired now...so I should be able to sleep good tonight...

9:55 PM-- except that I took a cat nap at around 7PM...gonna go to sleep at 11PM...

after all these years

                 Don't EVEN ask me how, but the roomie and I were talking about a Doctor we both had in the 80s...he was pretty "quirky" and his receptionist was pretty cool, and rather attractive...I seriously think I've been running into her for many years at various shows in and around my neighborhood w/o realising it...like last weekend at the Magical Mystery Girls gig at Hershey's...I know for a fact if I deliberately start bar hopping all over town trying to run into her, I won't... and if I try combing thru FB looking for her, I won't find her...so I'm gonna try to put her in the back of my Mind...hopefully, I won't forget she's there...

      SATURDAY 2PM- getting ready to leave Unique Thrift; I bought a book… I am so sleepy or tired or something but we’re leaving to go to the movies at about 5:30; the only other things I have to do today are take a nap and eat dinner... and then we’re going to a late afternoon movie; we should be back home by 9 o’clock (sheesh)...

9:46PM--got back from the movie about 15 minutes ago...A book I've been trying to get through for awhile now has been made into a movie, due out in the late Fall...the book and the movie are both called FIRST MAN...it's the biography of Neil Armstrong...

As of now, Angela is interested in coming to the OTWC next Thursday--I THINK...That would be nice, to put it mildly...LATER--except that Butch mentioned that *I* was gonna be the house guitarist...I think Angela has changed her Mind...which makes me rather sad...UPDATE--there seems to be more than one post relating to the open mic, at least one of those posts lists Angela as :"interested"...

      As for Cara/Svetlanna, I'm starting to wonder if she's WAY more "eccentric" than I originally thought, as in multiple personality...

boy, did *I* f**k up big time

                         FRIDAY 7/20/18 2:10AM--I met a girl singer at the OTWC...I thought (and still think) she was kinda cute...but there is NO WAY I would EVER consider trying to have a romantic relationship with her--I'm not THAT crazy or without scruples...she's only 26...unfortunately I confided my feelings to a friend...super unfortunately, her companion for the evening was also in the bathroom...
                             2:35--I can't believe he hasn't yet told her what I said...She and I are still (I think) FB friends...that may not be true by morning...the man I believe to be her Dad said her name was Cara Volkman--SHE said no, her name is Svetlanna Vladmirovna...after some research I'm now sure she has (at least) TWO FB profiles...but I dunno why...so her behavior is no less (but no more) weird IMO than the feeling I had (still have?) for her...I don't feel nearly as embarrassed or ashamed now as I did when I first came home..the purpose of multiple FB profiles escapes me...maybe the Russian name is the one she gives to the people from whom she wants to keep her distance...
       I think she lost her Mother recently; that would surely have some kind of effect on a person, right? She's come up with a few songs she would like to do, so apparently, she's still talking to me...which, whether I should be or not, makes me feel good...and yet, she's starting to make me a bit nervous...she might be quite a bit more "eccentric" than I'm comfortable with...

they almost always know...

              WEDNESDAY 7/18/18 10:23PM--from what I could ascertain on FB, Angela has ended her relationship with her significant other...I THINK she was keeping track of my activities at Agrodolcé on FB...or maybe that's wishful thinking on my part...But we MUST be realistic...forgetting for the moment my diminished sex drive, etc., I can't see me pursuing anything beyond a friendship with another woman...a Musical relationship? sure, possibly...emotional intimacy? sure...physical (but non-sexual) intimacy? hopefully...but it doesn't matter what *I* want--it's what Angela would want that matters...
              I don't know her well enough to know how perceptive she is, but I wouldn't be surprised if she's figured out that I am infatuated with her...women almost always know that...
            THURSDAY 4PM--the roomie is not going out tonight, but *I* probably am...Tish DID contact me, thru FB Messenger...Angela told me yesterday couldn't go out to the OTWC this week...that doesn't mean she can't  go to Hershey's though...I wouldn't be surprised if I came home unsatisfied...I suppose I could stay home, but I kinda don't wanna...sorta, in a way...
             7PM--well, whatever's gonna happen, it gonna happen in about an hour...

financial security--for a week or two

                WEDNESDAY 7/18/18 8AM--I've got money in the Bank, money in my pocket and I owe the roomie a little less than I did before...I'm  not totally sure what I borrowed the money for, besides the car stereo...it doesn't matter...
       Lou and I are still going out tonight--weather permitting...I was hoping to engineer my own personal MASH marathon, but apparently Netflix DOESN'T show that one...I really really REALLY think they did up until a few days ago...
             11:17AM--having an early Lunch, because I'll be having an early Dinner--because I'm leaving for Germantown a 5PM...
           3:55PM--Actually, I'm gonna go to Agrodolcé for Dinner...I'm only bringing Butterscotch...gonna stop by Music & Arts to get guitar strings...they're practically next to each other...
            I've just got done throwing hints to Angela, but I don't think she's interested in me...she seems to be having a problem with...somebody;  maybe it's her boyfriend (Steve?) I dunno...somebody caused her to ask on Facebook, in an abstract way, "when will I be loved?". HER answer: "apparently never"...that's gotta mean something, right?
     5:20PM— boy, am I ever early… I’ve got the spare strings if I need 'em; I’m getting pizza for dinner... I should be done eating by 6 o’clock, at which point I think Lou and his family will be arriving…
            10:17PM: just got home from Agrodolcé...Lou and I were pretty good, if brief--I wish I could get Lou to slow down a bit...I sat in with Pete for CINNAMON GIRL...and I sat in with Jeff Jones for his three originals...the Pizza was good; I managed to eat the whole thing--except the crusts...onto the OTWC...

Murphy's Law of social interaction

        TUESDAY 7/17/18 11:38AM--I found my stint as the house guitarist at the Crossroads open mic last night rather unsatisfying...as for tonight, I WANNA go to the IPO open mic tonight, but even doing not a whole lot at an open mic has taken some energy outta me...I'm sooo tempted to check with Angela to see if she's interested...my fantasy is that SHE would contact ME for directions or whatever...I wouldn't be at all surprised if, because I'm NOT going, SHE goes--and that's Murphy's Law of social interaction...she allegedly lives in Rockville, so she might already know where IOP is located...I can't guarantee that I'm gonna stay home, but I'm gonna try really hard to stay home...I don't think Dianne's going anywhere tonight, but if she does...

4PM--it's killing me that I don't have the courage to FBmsg Angela to find out if she's going to IPO tonight...I figure if she does go, she'll take photos, which may show up on FB tomorrow...the suspense is gonna kill me...maybe she'll end up at the OTWC on Thursday...all this emotion I'm wasting...I doubt if she's been thinking of me at all...as for tomorrow evening, as far as I know, Lou and I are "go" for the Agrodolcé open mic...I haven't heard anything either way...

                In Financial News, I have $24 in my pocket and the SSA check could/should be in my checking account tomorrow morning...If I don't go anywhere tonight, it will still be $24 in the morning...

            I just saw on FB that Barry and Dave (?) have a duo gig on August 11...maybe I'll sneak over there and check 'em out...but probably not...

          5PM-- I didn't really get a mid-day nap today and I'm starting to feel the effect of that loss...I can't imagine still being up at 11PM tonight...

6:21PM--when I wasn't even looking I found Angela's male companion on FB!!! that's sooo typical...I don't EVEN have the guts to send a "friend request"--pretty sure he would ignore it anyway...in fact, I would be surprised to hear from Angela (on FB) ever again...and I'm wondering if she's gonna be at IPO tonight...

8PM--feel like I'm getting that dammed 2nd wind...it's not quite as windy as usual, but still...I heard from Lou--we're still on for tomorrow...probably SHOULDN'T change strings on the acoustic...in fact, I'm gonna take Butterscotch in addition to the acoustic...last week Pete said that was OK...we'll see...

Judging from the photos I've seen so far, Angela DIDN'T go to the IPO open mic...

didn't plan on that

                        MONDAY 7/16/18 8:25AM--I got the songlist for the 26th...it IS mostly (real) Country Music...There are just over 50 songs to choose from...but I don't think I'll have any problems...

           Last night I had a dream with a woman I barely know in it--and it wasn't Angela...I dunno what, if anything, that means...

    8:48AM--the dishes have been taken care of...the towels are in the dryer...I don't think I need any groceries...it's already 74° outside...they say the inside of a car can be about 20 degrees hotter...IMO too late in the day to buy real cheese or fudgesicles...

          Saturday evening at Hershey's I hinted to Angela that I wouldn't mind being her lead guitarist, but now I think it's not gonna happen--I THINK she already has one...it's probably Steve...the story of my Life, right?

3:50PM--during my brief nap, I think I had another dream with a woman in it...I don't think I recognized her...starting to get nervous about tonight's open mic...I thought about using the gizmo, but I don't think I'm gonna...

9:13PM- so here I am at Crossroads … I guess I’m almost playing well enough;  but I will be glad when it’s over…I  gave a guy permission to use my rig… I told him not to mess with the knobs on the amp but he could mess with the fuzz box as much as he wanted to… Something tells me he did in fact change the settings on the amp itself-it seems louder than when I was playing… One of the hosts says we’re going to end early...I’m OK with that…

10:35PM--it doesn't feel like we ended early, but in any case, I'm home...I think the only amp setting that got adjusted by the guy to whom I leant it was the VOLUME...I'm pretty sure the amp survived the ordeal...

as for Tuesday, I don't think I'm going to IPO...but I wonder if Angela is...I bet if *I* don't SHE will...

be careful what you wish for

       SATURDAY 11:25PM--just got in from Hershey's...I would say the Magical Mystery Girls were 8 on a scale of 10...I went to Hershey's after leaving BEERS AND CHEERS TOO where Harmony River was playing...they were really good, a bit better than I thought they would be...

      But the high point of the evening, no, the weekend was meeting Angela Drago !!! She was with someone...I think I spooked him, annoyed him and ultimately pisssed him off...*I* think when they both got up from the table we were sharing to go out for a smoke, they actually left Hershey's altogether...She did accept my FB friend request, but I think it would be best to stay away from her--unless she contacts ME...that sound you hear is me crossing my fingers..I can't tell from looking at her FB page whether or not she's "in a relationship"...but, of course that doesn't matter at all because *I* am--and it's VERY complicated...

       Incidentally, while I was hanging out at B&C Too, I was invited to be house guitarist for the Crossroads open mic this coming Monday--it felt like an afterthought, like I was the least desirable option...but I said yes anyway...Before Angela walked into Hershey's, I told Jessica that she was "my favorite female"--now I kinda wish I had kept my feelings to myself...and I told Angela that I ( a total stranger) was glad she came out to Hershey's...I'm sure her date wishes I'd kept my feeling to myself or stayed home...oh well...

SUNDAY 8:43AM--had LOTSA trouble falling asleep last night, having some trouble concentrating today...I wonder if Angela had any trouble sleeping...like maybe there was tension between her and Steve, whatever their relationship is...can't worry about that now...and while I'm hoping to see more of her, I'm  not gonna hold my breath...

11:15AM--Sue and Mike will be here in a little over an hour...all I have to do, as far as I know, is change my shirt and underwear...and make my Lunch...

7:15PM--just sitting down to Dinner...the visit with Sue and Mike went well enuff; after they left, I took a nap...I'll likely be up until Midnight...whether I wanna be or not...

7:45PM--now I can start thinking about being the house guitarist at Crossroads tomorrow...I think Angela has been there for some reason--the open mic perhaps...and I'll be doing that again at the OTWC in about a week and a half...I'm supposed to get a set list from Danny or Brian...I think we will be playing some (real?) Country Music, so I plan to take the Tele...

a dangerous obsession

          FRIDAY 7/13/18 9:49AM--I suspect there's a LOT of stuff on Netflix that I would wanna watch...at this minute, I've been watching a documentary on Pentatonix...there seem to be a lot of gay folks around the group, besides the two members of the group itself...I find that a teeny bit unsettling...and I'm NOT homophobic--at least I don't think I am...
                  I guess it's possible that I've been too active lately; at least, that's how I feel right now...
4PM--not 100% sure I want to, but I'm having pizza for Dinner...no plan to go out tonight--maybe tomorrow night, maybe not...

almost had a MAJOR financial disaster...but didn’t

      THURSDAY 6AM- it belatedly occurred to me that my Geico payment would come from my charge card I think or maybe not I guess I’d better check on that… no, it comes from my checking account--so hopefully, I just put BACK the $90 I mistakenly transferred to the credit card account... I’ll check on that later...

    6:35PM-yes, I corrected that boo boo from this morning... sooo relieved...and so now I’m hanging out at the Music Café in Damascus... my waitress is a dead ringer for Jessica--almost… smaller boobies and maybe a bit shorter...

Lou and I did good vocally, ok lead guitar-wise...we might get to play some more, but I dunno for sure...been thinking about how happy I get when the cleaning ladies leave... isn’t that weird?

    Our second set was ok, but not any better than that...

how much time do I need to recover?

        MONDAY 7/9/18 8:13PM--I found our two days on vacation rather unsatisfying...and my sleep cycle is soooo fucked up at this point...I still don't think I've got anything going on other than the appointment with Borelli tomorrow...open mics? I have no idea which ones I'm doing, if any...
         6PM--time for Dinner...tonight it's mac and cheese...
8:20PM--dinner was good...then I went upstairs to Dianne's office and watched one episode of West Wing...I've just started the last season...the roomie earlier expressed some concern about my doing nothing all day...I can talk to Dr. Borelli about that tomorrow...

     TUESDAY 4:35PM--saw Borelli...also saw a friend waiting in the office...my sleep cycle is still in a shambles...I didn't get the afternoon nap I wanted, so I might be in bed before 11PM...I WAS gonna go to CVS to get my drugs and Wendy's for Dinner, but It's too hot for me...I'll have sandwiches for dinner, now that I've got real cheese; but CVS will wait until morning...

WEDNESDAY 6:24PM-so here I am at Agrodolce, nervously waiting for...I dunno what...no Lou, no Wayne...I told Pete the host that my Plan is to be a sideman, if anyone needs a guitarist or bassist...or harmony vocals...
6:44-a drummer I’m not all that fond of  arrived with a full drum kit--Pete was not happy and tried to explain to the guy we don’t use a full drum kit in this open mic...So the drummer in question (Rohn)  left in a huff...I’m not so sure this was a good idea after all… I hope I’m wrong...

                   8PM-played behind  Pete, did OK...Pete seemed “uncertain” of the chords of the covers we did...played behind Rob, did kinda OK...considering I didn’t know the songs he played-songs he wrote...there’s a guy here playing ELECTRIC guitar-hopefully next time I come here, I will too...I checked with Pete-he’s OK with that idea...it seems like I will be playing behind at least one other performer...

           10:25PM--played alongside Jeff Herbert, and that was it for me as a accompanist...I think Lou and I are meeting at the Music Café tomorrow evening...I THINK Dianne will be going out Saturday evening...if SHE is, then I just might...

not quite as much fun as I'd hoped

                   SUNDAY 7/8/18 6:53PM--just got up from a very much needed nap...we've been back from PA since about 4:30...even though *I* didn't drive home, I'm super fried...the Dr. Pepper and M&Ms didn't seem to kick in when I wanted them to...I'm worried now that when 10 or 11PM rolls around. I'll be more awake and alert than I wanna be...
             I have no idea what I'm doing this coming week...I THINK there's an appointment with Borelli on Tuesday, but otherwise, I'm in the dark--even though it's my Life...
              The Lancaster area seems to have fewer thrift/antique stores than before...and, like the last time we were there, we got very lost for awhile--THAT is never fun...The visit to the Outlet was a success for the roomie, but *I* came home empty-handed...I saw quite a few books in the Book Warehouse that I kinda wanted, but not enough to actually spend the money...the selection may not be as good, but prices are better at Unique...
     7:25 and I haven't had Dinner yet...I guess I should, whether I feel like it or not...
8:51PM--a little later than usual, but still--I've got my second wind...I just figured I wouldn't get it at all...but I did, dammit...

all in one day

    SATURDAY 7/7 7:51AM- not quite 8 o’clock and the roommate and I are at the Germantown flea market… I almost bought a digital camera for $75…  I can’t help but wonder why is the guy selling it in the first place?  I didn’t go up the last of three aisles, because I was afraid I might see something and buy it… I ran into a friend that said whatever Guitars were here are actually gone already... apparently they were gone before he could buy any...
   A train  went through the area; I heard it but I didn’t see it… Now I’m sitting at a spot where I would see one if it comes by... it would theoretically be about 20 feet beneath me and to my left...I  imagine another one will pass through here as we are leaving...One  of Murphy’s Laws of railroading I guess... A train will go by if you’re NOT looking for it...
    I need to save my money and my energy for the trip to Pennsylvania…  I have $120 in my pocket that I’m hoping will last six days; I haven’t been keeping track of it for the past couple of days, and I need to get back into doing that…
          10:38AM--might be on our way to Pennsylvania within the hour...I actually managed to catch a few winks after we got back from Germantown...obviously I needed to...

consider that a rehearsal or I LIKE surprises

          FRIDAY 8:06 AM--the gig with Ray in Severna Park was rather unsatisfying for me--as a guitarist, that is...and I felt claustrophobic onstage...otherwise, I had a fair amount of fun...I sure hope he was joking, but he kept saying "see ya tomorrow night" and *I* kept saying "no, you won't..." and not just because I need a day to recuperate but because the weekend in Lancaster that I'm looking forward to next weekend is actually THIS weekend...and the weekend starts today...
                There wasn't much of a turnout last night, but the people who were there seemed to like us...I told Ray that if HE was happy, I would try to be happy...he said he was, so..
             I feel somewhat overwhelmed by...well, I'm not sure exactly what...for me at least, there was a "magic" moment or two at last night's gig, but they were vocal moments...I'll take what I can get...
          Because of the trip to Lancaster tomorrow, I don't have to buy anymore food for the house...I plan to go to CVS 1) to make sure I've got all my meds, and to get some Melatonin to help me sleep...I guess I'll be heading out shortly...
    4:48PM--went to CVS...made Amber smile...quit Fakebook for the umteenth time...politely dressed down  by Ray, but I deserved it...going to Wendy's for Dinner, to get chicken fingers...still gotta pack and I might have to do Laundry...
8:32PM--I'm mostly packed...turns out I don't have to do any Laundry...and that makes me rather happy...

not the usual Thursday thing

    THURSDAY 10AM- I’m here in the Kentlands about to pay a visit to the Prichard music Academy store to buy a set of guitar strings for the acoustic guitar... I think that’s quicker than going to Victor Litz in old town Gaithersburg…I’m  going to try real real hard not to be nervous… I’m not sure if taking a Xanax before this gig is a good idea or not--I don’t want to be groggy on the way home and it’s a long ride back... as of now, the plan is to go to Wendy’s and get a burger-that will be tonight’s dinner… of course, they screwed up the burger the last time, so maybe I better be prepared for that...
       The store is supposed to open at 10 o’clock; as far as I can tell they’re not open yet and it’s almost 10 after… I’m fairly determined NOT to go to Litz this morning if I can help it...
       10:34AM--was in and out of Pritchard's in about five minutes...Joe didn't seem to recognize me...as far as I can tell, weather will not be a problem...we'll see...

not a problem

TUESDAY 7/3/18 12:21PM--Dianne was invited to one of her friends for a July 4th BBQ...I initially thought the invite was for both of us...I was wrong...but I'm perfectly fine with that...I haven't heard otherwise, so I still think I'm gigging with Ray on Thursday...dunno when I'm supposed to get there or if anyone else will be doing the gig with us...I hope my questions will be answered by Thursday afternoon...

9:30PM--I don't think I'm gonna make it to Midnight tonight...might not even make it to 11PM...Dianne says there's no trash pick-up tomorrow because it's the 4th of July...that's fine by me...

10:10PM--as far as I can tell, Ray's gig (Thursday) starts at 7...so I hope to leave here by 5:30, having already had Dinner...it should take about an hour to get to Severna Park...

WEDNESDAY 7/4 11:25AM--Ray is playing at Pirates' Cove today at 5...I MIGHT go do that instead--the roomie won't be around...
11:45AM--on second thought, I'm 99% sure I'm gonna stick with the original Plan...that's Brian Boru in Severna Park tomorrow... it’s allegedly about the same distance away, but I would have to get there a lot earlier--meaning I would have to leave here sooner… So I will do the gig with Ray tomorrow; I think Tish will be there…  and this way I can enjoy having the house to myself later this evening-- I guess I got used to Dianne not being around during the day…

5:55PM--I didn't quite have the Dinner I planned on having, but I won't starve...and I'm glad I didn't go do the gig with Ray today...if nothing else, that leaves me more energy to do tomorrow's gig...

9:18PM--the roomie is back home, watching July 4th stuff on TV...I am not...