expectations not met

          FRIDAY 2/1/19 8:40AM--had been looking forward to my Monthly gig as a member of the House Band at the open mic...I think I woulda have rather stayed home, to hell with the $50 bucks...
         It's snowing...the roomie covered HER windshield;  I'm not gonna bother...She will still have to clean the rest of the windows, right? I, on the other hand, have no plans to go anywhere--I don't think I need anything from the grocery store, so to hell with it...
  4:15PM-still feeling down, mostly about last night’s gig...for once I don’t feel like discussing it...Dianne said she wanted to do something fun tomorrow… So we made plans; but now she’s not sure if she wants to carry out that Plan... I think she’s nervous about going back to work on Monday...that’s understandable...and I’m gonna have to adjust to her not being around...being alone is sometimes a good thing, sometimes it’s lonely...
      SUNDAY 2/3/19 8:54AM--so we DID go to Frederick yesterday...and we went to Cracker Barrel for Dinner...today? the big event is grocery shopping...I feel kinda "oogy" for some reason...a lot can happen in 18 hours, but I don't yet feel like going to GYY...I WANT to feel like it, but I don't, not yet anyway... or I’ll go and just sit on the sidelines and watch…
 WEDNESDAY 2/6/19 9:23AM--I think I'm going out tonight; I'm getting things done, little things admittedly, but still...
4:21PM--I didn't get a mid-day nap, so I decided to rehearse whatever I'm gonna play tonight...we'll see if I practiced enough...