could hardly care less

 

                FRIDAY 12/11/2020 5:35PM--How depressed I must be to not even wanna write about how depressed I am...there's a song in there somewhere I think...
          THURSDAY 12/17/2020 9:34PM--not really feeling any better...a curious thing has started happening...I see a photo of an attractive woman, and I get--something--more likely lonely than horny...just spotted an old photo of someone I used to know on Flakebook...it was taken during a period of unintentional estrangement, about 1989...the whole time I've known her, she was already with someone...weird...*I* don't have the vocabulary to describe the feeling...Angela has expressed the idea on FB that's SHE'S "lonely"...if she only knew...I don't think her knowing my feelings for her, whatever they actually are, would make her happy...I'm fully aware of what I look like, and how messed up I am...besides which, I'm still in a bizarre relationship of some kind with my ex-wife...So even IF I was, er, uh, capable of a "physical" relationship with Angela and IF she had affection for me, I don't think my "roomie" would be at all happy about me having any kind of relationship with another woman...I think I can guarantee that...
              SATURDAY 12/19/2020 11:12PM--I join certain Flakebook groups to entertain myself and educate myself to some degree as well...but if I'm unhappy, I split...I did that a little while ago with a Phish fan site...I can explore their Music just fine by myself, thank you...I've left one or two other groups; if I'm not happy, I split...Flakebook is full of assholes, like the whole Planet...